Friday Fun

Jamison with his water gun...he thinks it's loads of fun to wet us with the "juice"

Jannah showing off her latest gap...she pulled her tooth at school

all bundled up

Jordan was so excited about his new gloves, he wore them for two days...slept in them, played in them, you get the picture!

my boys eating suckers...and barely able to keep their eyes open due to the sunshine!

A Putt-Putt Kind of Day

We've had some very mild weather recently, and we thought something outdoors would be fun. So G and I put our brains together and came up with putt-putt. We had a blast, Jordan was the star with 2 holes in one! He's ready to go play again; too bad they are closed for winter! Jannah, she had fun, but her competitive edge kicked in; she did NOT like that Jordan was doing better than her. She is a LOT like her Daddy when it comes to winning and being on top...Jamison, he enjoyed himself and did his best to play. He kinda kept messing the game up, the older J's were getting a little impatient with him! The dynamics of our family are funny to me right now. Sometimes I laugh at them, sometimes I want to pull my hair out; mostly, I'm just enjoying each one of my little blessings and all of our days together.

I love this picture of my Jordi, it's rare to get a true smile from him

Jamison with his prized ball and putter (he was not sure why he had to return them at the end of our game...you'll see what I'm talking about at the end of the post)

Jordi teeing off

This is what I love. The place wasn't too busy, good thing; we were all over the place. Trying to keep everyone on track and occupied while we all 5 took our turns was a little bit of a challenge and comical. No worries, the J's just wander and occupy themselves!

Jannah's victory jump

Jamison's ball was gone for good after the 18th hole, that was just not cool to him!

Flashback Friday

I just couldn't help myself...I love flashbacks. They make me think of time and how quickly it flies, they cause me to be still and reflect, so that I might see God at work in my life and in the life of my family. My flashback for this Friday is a mere 3 years ago. These pics were taken in Branson Missouri; we had gone there for Thanksgiving, and my parents joined us. It was a fun trip and I'm ready to go back...and we can, because we are only 4-5 hours from this family-fun-spot! Jannah is 3 1/2 and Jordan is 1 1/2...they are so cute and little, I wish they would stop growing up. Since that's not possible, I will just enjoy the memories I have made with them...

Reflections

I have had many thoughts and times of reflection surrounding October and what should have been. I should have given birth to our daughter October first. Even now as I type, the truth of the matter seems distant and surreal. I guess surreal sums up the entire experience of losing Josianne. I think about her every day. Some days, my thoughts are few, some days they are many. Some days my mind travels back so quickly to the day I held her in my arms, some days I have to trudge to get there. I don't know if that makes any sense. I think it is God's way of healing me and still guarding my feeble heart. There are times I want to hide the fact that our baby died in the womb at 24 weeks, there are other days I want to remember her and mention her name without tears welling up in my eyes. I know that will come and it will get easier. She is real to me, to all of us. The other night, I was talking to my Granny, who just celebrated her 81st birthday, and we talked about Josianne. It seemed strange, but we talked about her being in heaven and being like Christ...it's so hard to imagine and understand. She's not a baby in heaven, at least I don't think so. But yet, in my mind, she will always be my baby. I see mothers holding their babies, and it's bittersweet to watch. I rejoice for that Mommy that cradles her baby, but then my heart aches for my baby and the time on earth that I lost with her. Sometimes my arms ache to hold a baby, but I am scared of that too; how will my heart handle that? I still wonder why we lost Josianne and how we lost her. When I am full of sorrow, God gently reminds me that He is a god of love and mercy and that he promises not to make our journey here on earth easy; but he does promise to carry us through the storms of life and the joys of life. So, my reflection brings joy and sorrow. Sorrow because I miss Josianne, joy because I will see her one day...